Five Years Later

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I think everyone will remember where they were on 9/11 when they first heard that the World Trade Center was attacked. I was at work in the church office. A sweet lady in our congregation called to let us know what had just happened. She knew we didn’t have a tv on and probably wouldn’t know. We rushed to a tv and huddled around it the rest of the morning. I remember internally screaming and outwardly gasping “No!” as we watched live as the 2nd plane hit the 2nd tower. This was beyond my comprehension. Who could fathom that this kind of thing could ever happen?

I was 7 months pregnant with Taylor at the time. I remember lying in bed that night absolutely afraid to shut my eyes for fear of whether or not morning would come. What might be next? It took me quite some time to move past those initial fears. I wondered what kind of world we were bringing a child into. What kinds of things would happen during the next 20 years while she was still under our roof and what would the world be like then, when we turned her loose into it? I remember wondering when it would be okay to laugh again and not feel something other than the moment. And the first time I heard an airplane overhead after air space had re-opened, it was as though I hadn’t heard an airplane before – this time there was so much more attached to it.

Grief is etched into countless hearts over what happened that day. Although I did not lose any loved ones, I feel that I did lose some of my innocence that morning while watching people run for their lives on television. There are still times that I grieve that loss. There is a glimmer of hope inside of me that one day, our world will return to a place that I remember it as a child. Simpler. Safer. A time when I could walk home from school by myself or take my bike to the grocery store to get some eggs. When taking a bottle of water on an airplane was allowed and a flight did not require a pill to calm my nerves and reduce my anxiety. I don’t know that these are legitimate hopes, perhaps our world is a bit far gone for that. I hold on to the promise that one day the Lord will return to the Earth, and unleash His power over Satan and he and sin and evil WILL be defeated for eternity!


~ by hthr on September 11, 2006.

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